internet advert

[Ken Gargett]

apparently some bloke has recently posted this to sell his blocks. he may need a lesson in how to deal with customers (although rob and i do know someone who'd probably advertise his cows like that).

[El Presidente]

I have half a dozen mates that advertisement could have been written by

[Ken Gargett]

I have half a dozen mates that advertisement could have written by

i assume you know who i meant.

[zuma]

Excellent!

[sounddust]

I think this guy's straight as an arrow, just look at the warning at the top, he proffers none of them.

[El Presidente]

I have half a dozen mates that advertisement could have been written by

Macho

Shagga

Junior Shagga

Meggsa on a bad day

Scottie

Spiro

[PointSource]

HAHAHHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[laficion]

WOWWWW This guy knows how to get to the point with no BS-ing around.

I'll bet that he has no problems with his Mother-in-Law .

[ChicagoWhiteSox]

Should I email him just to piss him off!?

[gerem]

Man that guy is angry....I like it

[shrink]

Should I email him just to piss him off!?

Yeah, send him this message:

WE WISH TO PURCHASE TWENTY ONE MILLION, THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY THOUSAND CEMENT BLOCKS

FIRST, I MUST SOLICIT YOUR STRICTEST CONFIDENCE IN THIS TRANSACTION. THIS IS BY VIRTUE OF ITS NATURE AS BEING UTTERLY CONFIDENTIAL AND 'TOP SECRET'. I AM SURE AND HAVE CONFIDENCE OF YOUR ABILITY AND RELIABILITY TO PROSECUTE A TRANSACTION OF THIS GREAT MAGNITUDE INVOLVING A PENDING TRANSACTION REQUIRING MAXIIMUM CONFIDENCE.

WE ARE TOP OFFICIAL OF THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL WHO ARE INTERESTED IN IMPORTATION OF YOUR CEMENT BLOCKS INTO OUR COUNTRY WITH FUNDS WHICH ARE PRESENTLY TRAPPED IN NIGERIA. IN ORDER TO COMMENCE THIS BUSINESS WE SOLICIT YOUR ASSISTANCE TO ENABLE US TRANSFER INTO YOUR ACCOUNT THE SAID TRAPPED FUNDS.

THE SOURCE OF THIS FUND IS AS FOLLOWS; DURING THE LAST MILITARY REGIME HERE IN NIGERIA, THE GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS SET UP COMPANIES AND AWARDED THEMSELVES CONTRACTS WHICH WERE GROSSLY OVER-INVOICED IN VARIOUS MINISTRIES. THE PRESENT CIVILIAN GOVERNMENT SET UP A CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL AND WE HAVE IDENTIFIED A LOT OF INFLATED CONTRACT FUNDS WHICH ARE PRESENTLY FLOATING IN THE CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA READY FOR PAYMENT.

HOWEVER, BY VIRTUE OF OUR POSITION AS CIVIL SERVANTS AND MEMBERS OF THIS PANEL, WE CANNOT ACQUIRE THIS MONEY IN OUR NAMES. I HAVE THEREFORE, BEEN DELEGATED AS A MATTER OF TRUST BY MY COLLEAGUES OF THE PANEL TO LOOK FOR AN OVERSEAS PARTNER INTO WHOSE ACCOUNT WE WOULD TRANSFER THE SUM OF US$21,320,000.00(TWENTY ONE MILLION, THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY THOUSAND U.S DOLLARS). HENCE WE ARE WRITING YOU THIS LETTER. WE HAVE AGREED TO SHARE THE MONEY THUS; 1. 20% FOR THE ACCOUNT OWNER 2. 70% FOR US (THE OFFICIALS) 3. 10% TO BE USED IN SETTLING TAXATION AND ALL LOCAL AND FOREIGN EXPENSES. IT IS FROM THE 70% THAT WE WISH TO COMMENCE THE IMPORTATION BUSINESS.

PLEASE,NOTE THAT THIS TRANSACTION IS 100% SAFE AND WE HOPE TO COMMENCE THE TRANSFER LATEST SEVEN (7) BANKING DAYS FROM THE DATE OF THE RECEIPT OF THE FOLLOWING INFORMATIOM BY TEL/FAX; 234-1-7740449, YOUR COMPANY'S SIGNED, AND STAMPED LETTERHEAD PAPER THE ABOVE INFORMATION WILL ENABLE US WRITE LETTERS OF CLAIM AND JOB DESCRIPTION RESPECTIVELY. THIS WAY WE WILL USE YOUR COMPANY'S NAME TO APPLY FOR PAYMENT AND RE-AWARD THE CONTRACT IN YOUR COMPANY'S NAME.

WE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO DOING THIS BUSINESS WITH YOU AND SOLICIT YOUR CONFIDENTIALITY IN THIS TRANSATION. PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE THE RECEIPT OF THIS LETTER USING THE ABOVE TEL/FAX NUMBERS. I WILL SEND YOU DETAILED INFORMATION OF THIS PENDING PROJECT WHEN I HAVE HEARD FROM YOU.

YOURS FAITHFULLY,

"DR KENNETH GARGETT"

[ChicagoWhiteSox]

I think that email would definately piss him off!

[HawaiiBill]

LMFAO!!!!!!!

I had barely stopped laughing when Shrinks letter got me started again. That was funny as hell, thanks!!

[Ken Gargett]

shrink, love the letter but give the bloke my name and i'll sign you up for the north american man/boy love festival or whatever it is.

[gerem]

Shrink, you're looking for trouble

[GoSteelers]

That is awesome! We've all thought like that but only wish to advertise it!