First Lady Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 The Hormone Guide Women will understand this and men should memorize it! Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other! DANGEROUS: What's for dinner? SAFER: Can I help you with dinner? SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner? ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some wine. DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that? SAFER: Wow, you sure look good in brown! SAFEST: WOW! Look at you! ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some wine DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about? SAFER: Could we be overreacting? SAFEST: Here's my paycheck. ULTRA SAFE : Here, have some wine. DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that? SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left. SAFEST: Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that? ULTRA SAFE : Here, have some wine. DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day? SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today. SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe! ULTRA SAFE : Here, have some wine I now hope you all understand :-D Lisa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ethernut Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 Lisa, may I offer you some wine? :-D I think I got it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokum Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 So I guess..."hey fatass get me a sandwich " doesn't work ???:-D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cam Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 i think ethernet wants something, nice lisa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eriksson20 Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 Hi Lisa, this sounds an awful lot like my life. My wife was been takin some extra hormones, since we are forced to try a baby with the help of modern medicine. and the mood swings are like: :crying: 24/7 ... and you guys think that the normal monthly hormone attacks are hard to handle wine... bah! ...wine does not do a thing... next time i will try some booze or something... welcome to try my shoes for a while. miker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cam Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 but wine is booze Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eriksson20 Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 » but wine is booze i ment hard liqueour as in Finlandia Vodka or such Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zuma Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 » » but wine is booze » » i ment hard liqueour as in Finlandia Vodka or such Betcha tranquilliser darts would do the trick! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eriksson20 Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 » » » but wine is booze » » » » i ment hard liqueour as in Finlandia Vodka or such » » Betcha tranquilliser darts would do the trick! i would not count on it, but i might try that one... thanks miker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smokin Bulldog Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 This is going on the fridge for future reference:-D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ethernut Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 » i think ethernet wants something, » nice lisa hehe you'd be absolutely right! ..and that wold be... "Cigars" :-P -Ether Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 What about mens hormones?? I'll try to understand her if she will understand that my single hormone says, I'm ready for it now and again latter.:-D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eriksson20 Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 » What about mens hormones?? I'll try to understand her if she will » understand that my single hormone says, I'm ready for it now and again » latter.:-D good point, why "wantin it all the time" -hormone isn't as acceptable as "i am ugly, fat, whatta ya lookin at" -hormone. :-P that's the question... miker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zuma Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 »why "wantin it all the time" -hormone isn't as acceptable as » "i am ugly, fat, whatta ya lookin at" -hormone. :-P » » that's the question... » » miker Hey... applying both safest + ultra safe methodologies above, whether the situation calls it or not, you can get anything anytime (it works also when you need approval for more cigars - that is, if she ever needs 2 know ;-) ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
genevapics Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 » Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to » do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! How about EVERYDAY of the month. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eriksson20 Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 » »why "wantin it all the time" -hormone isn't as acceptable as » » "i am ugly, fat, whatta ya lookin at" -hormone. :-P » » » » that's the question... » » » » miker » » Hey... applying both safest + ultra safe methodologies above, whether the » situation calls it or not, you can get anything anytime (it works » also when you need approval for more cigars - that is, if she ever needs 2 » know ;-) ) hush... keep it down. the mrs might hear you... miker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Bolivar Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 I'm still going for the old school "bring up a beer from the cellar when you go and change the laundry in the washing machine!". :-D Speaking of that: Do you guys know why the bride allways wears white? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cam Posted May 11, 2007 Share Posted May 11, 2007 » » i think ethernet wants something, » » nice lisa » » hehe you'd be absolutely right! ..and that wold be... "Cigars" :-P » » -Ether i hope its cigars Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Bolivar Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 » Speaking of that: Do you guys know why the bride allways wears white? So the dishwasher matches the color of the washing machine! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colt45 Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 » » Speaking of that: Do you guys know why the bride allways wears white? » » So the dishwasher matches the color of the washing machine! Tom, are you married? If so, I Triple-Dog-Dare you to show her this thread....:-D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaylax5 Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 My problem with Lisa's theory is...my wife doesn't drink wine! EVER! On our first date I had wine and cheese laid out and she turns to me and says "I don't drink and I don't eat cheese" I was like "well alrighty then". The good thing is she doesn't drink my stuff...the flip side is she doesn't get drunk...EVER! Oh well...life goes on and I work A LOT. Cheers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Bolivar Posted May 13, 2007 Share Posted May 13, 2007 » Tom, are you married? If so, I Triple-Dog-Dare you to show » her this thread....:-D I'm married for over ten years now. Knowing me a bit you can imagine that my partner needs to have a lot of humor in lots of ways! :-D She already knows the jokes... Just as well as she knows why she has such small hands... So she can easily clean the small corners. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Presidente Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 » » Just as well as she knows why she has such small hands... » » So she can easily clean the small corners. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freefallguy Posted November 15, 2008 Share Posted November 15, 2008 »My wife was been takin some extra hormones "Mmmmmm, hormones" Wooohoooo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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