Friday Funny: Artie OK after knee surgery

[El Presidente]

My great mate and accountant Artie had knee surgery Yesterday. Possible 8 weeks on crutches. I will look after his Bentley while he is incapacitated 😉

He is doing well. The xray however shows the extent of his issues

 

 

[JohnS]

As the Greeks say, "may Artie live to a 100!" What a legend!

[MoeFOH]

Gifted in more ways than one! 

[WarriorPrincess]

Well I am seeing another side to Arthur now  

[Chibearsv]

10 minutes ago, WarriorPrincess said:

Well I am seeing another side to Arthur now  

Unfortunately, so are we all 😁

[westg]

So funny...🤣 I was about to post a Friday funny. I am so glad I checked first as nothing can top that. I think we should have a permanent Friday Funny thread. 

[Chas.Alpha]

Thank God he didn’t have ankle surgery! 😬

[MrBirdman]

Hey if the accounting business gets old there's always Onlyfans!

Went through a foot surgery a few years back - not as intensive as a knee but recovery was still a PITA. Absolutely worth it in the end though. It was also a good excuse for smoking more, since what better way to enjoy being stuck on your rear. Please wish Artie a swift recovery.

[Fuzz]

It was cold in radiology when they took him for his x-ray.

[joeypots]

Condolences to Mrs Artie.

[Drguano]

A mountain of a man has a high-pitched squeaky voice, so after years of rejection he goes to the doctor... 

The doctor does lab work, examines the guy all over, and sits down with the man. "Well," the doctor says, "all your labs, including your testosterone level, are absolutely normal. The thing is that your penis..."

^{"Yes, doctor? What about my penis?"} squeaks the man.

"You have an unusually large penis, and the weight is pulling on your vocal cords, making them produce a higher pitch. We can remove the middle 5 inches and reanastomose (reconnect) the ends. The resultant weight reduction will allow your voice to return to a normal tibre for a man your size."

The guy looks down into his lap and squeakily says, ^{"OK, doc. Do what you have to do."}

The doctor sets up the surgery, which is uneventful, and the guy wakes from surgery. The surgical nurse is there and gives him his discharge instructions, including, instructions to return in three weeks and that he will find that his voice will be appropriately deep by then.

Three weeks later the guy shows up for his appointment, hugs the doctor, and says in a deep manly voice, "Doc, it worked perfect! I have deep, manly voice now! Thank you so much!" 
 

^{"Don't mention it."} squeaks the doctor.

[Drguano]

While examining the the body of Mr. Schwartz, a mortician notices that Schwartz has the largest penis he has ever seen. "I'm sorry, Mr. Schwartz," says the mortician, "But I can't send you to be cremated with a tremendously huge penis like this. It has to be saved for posterity." The mortician removes the penis, places it in a jar and puts the jar in his briefcase. When he gets home, he decides to show it to his wife. "I have something to show you that you won't believe," he says, removing the jar from his briefcase. "Oh my God!" she screams, "Schwartz is dead!"