How do you keep the fire burning

[Dbone]

Hard to follow after the Professor, which gave great advise.

But there's a lot of guys who just get boring after they settle into a relationship, either in marriage or not. After they feel conformably accepted, this can take years mind you, they just get down right boring. The "courting" Professor spoke of completely goes away, and it shouldn't. Think of how head of heals you where for your girl back when you first met. Bring yourself back to that mindset and your mojo will start to do it's thing. Little things like "holding hands", learning about childhood summers or vacations, going to mini-golf or the batting cages, surprise dinner & movie, cute text's throughout the day... etc. She's an interesting woman, you'll never understand her, but don't give up trying.

[cubanmule7]

Wow! This thread is taking on a life of it's own. Keep the the great posts coming!

[CanuckSARTech]

Lots and lots and LOTS of chocolate.

[cubanmule7]

Lots and Lots of baby oil too!

[LeafLover]

Oh hell yah! Line the bed with a clear shower curtain and bring on the baby oil !!!

[hansa]

One word : "Hermès" !

Ok.... i've clearly not read the part 'bout cheap

[Ken Gargett]

it would seem too late to offer the most obvious advice. to avoid divorce, avoid the institution of marriage in the first place.

[Ken Gargett]

I've been married for over 30 years.

mate of mine says something similar - he'll readily tell people he has been happily married for 4-0 years. then adds, "sadly, my wife has not".

that is possibly marginally better than another mate who introduced me to "his current wife". she took it remarkably well.

[Geo17pip]

For a successful relationship men and women need two different things. Men must feel that their partner respects them. Women must feel their partner loves them. Make her feel loved and she will always feel connected. It doesn't take much...just listen to her...she will give you hints.

My wife and I work different schedules so staying connected is very important. Once a month I send a card to her at her work and twice a year flowers (this shows her co-workers she is loved...women need this public display). She's told me she likes coming home to a made bed...I just like a bed...but I know in five minutes I can make the bed...and everyday she comes home to a made bed we've reconnected without me being there. I make dinner for her once a week...usually a grilled steak dinner...I get a steak and she feels loved. Once a woman feels loved then she's open for the physical side of things...do not ignore this...and don't forget the order of it as well. All my suggestions are pretty inexpensive.. but man do they payoff!

Just remember she wants to feel loved, and she wants the people around her to see she is loved, but it doesn't have to be expensive.

God Bless.

PS. Glad to hear things ain't bad.

This is great advice A+ If going out with your lady is an economic problem.... sorry to say but maybe you should spend half as much on cigars and the rest on going out on dates. Just an idea

[Geo17pip]

Keep her on edge by discreetly acknowledging the beauty of other women and likewise respond with a smile to any flirts you get. Not too much to cause a scene, just enough for her to know that if she's not careful there are others willing to take her place... I've found that the more attractive women around the more "protective" your wife gets...

This is true, but you must also acknowledge that you wife is the most beautiful and tell her often. They love that

[Geo17pip]

I've been married for over 30 years. Happily. I will offer some suggestions. Note that my comments do NOT mean that I have done any of the following myself (plausible deniability).

1. She wants to feel desired by you, like you are still courting her, like she is the light of your life. It's not just about dates. You can have a special date at home.

2. Make it a habit to show her that you adore her. Buy her special gifts for no special occasion. Bring her flowers out of the blue. Surprise her with an offer to take her out to dinner, or cook for her, when you think she is tired and could use a break from cooking. Tell her she should put her feet up, you will put the kids to bed or do the dishes, or take out the trash.

3. She wants to know that you think she is a hot piece of ass. Grab her butt and kiss her and tell her how sexy she is, at odd times. Tell her how much you love it when she sleeps naked. Demand that she throw away all of her pajamas, tell her that sleeping naked with her is the hottest thing you can imagine. If you catch her changing clothes, stop whatever you are doing and stare at her and comment on how you can only think about one thing when you see her undressed.

4. When you lay the wood to her, leave her exhausted and completely satisfied.

5. Tell her how superior she is to all of the other women in your life. Miss no opportunity to tell her that her friends, movie stars, you name it, are horse faced, fat asses, annoying, etc.

6. Once you have done those basic things, come back for advanced instruction from The Professor.

Wow great stuff Proff!

[cubanmule7]

Professor, I've been doing those things for 19 years! When does the advanced instruction begin?

[cubanmule7]

Regarding the Profs post, I have a smokin hot wife that I never hesitate to compliment. The thing is every time I do it, I get "oh yeah right, I've got this and that I need to get rid of " instead of "thanks honey,when you say those things it makes me feel really special"

Maybe some women can chime in here. Just seems like every time you give them a positive they hit you with a negative, whats up with that?

Don't think it's a self confidence thing because I've heard her thank other people when given a compliment